“I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day.”
— Anonymous
"If I was an Olympic athlete, I’d rather come in last than win the silver medal. You win the gold, you feel good. You win the bronze, you think, ‘at least I got something.’ But you win that silver, that’s like, ‘Congratulations, you almost won! Of all the losers, you came in first! You’re the number one loser! No one lost ahead of you!’
—Jerry Seinfeld
“This a Song I wrote about my girlfriend. She cheated on me with another man. It's called "I Can't Get Over You til You Get Out From Under Him."
— Larry the Cable Guy
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