Was just trying to relax this Christmas

December 26, 2018
Dow Jones: 21,792 (-2.91%)
S&P 500: 2,351 (-2.71%)
Nasdaq: 6,193 (-5.14%)
Bitcoin: $3,836 (+0.60%)
10-Year Treasury: 2.741%

No one got us the KFC chicken scented burning log (and we're okay with that).

We're less cool with the markets' worst Christmas Eve ever. The Dow lost nearly 700 points as President Trump tweet-shamed the Fed Chairman for raising interest rates. Then Asian markets dropped while US ones were closed for holiday arguing.

1. Yoga tech Mindbody gets bought up for $1.9B 

Treat yo' self... Feeling last-minute gifting pressure, a San Francisco private equity firm bought itself Mindbody on Christmas Eve. Mindbody shares surged 68% to reach the deal price of $36.50 per share. Next, the publicly-traded fitness class scheduling app will transform into a private company. Burn the gift receipt.

Nama-stay in the app... Mindbody's not just a digital concierge to book that 6pm Vinyasa Flow or 45-minute Recycle Studio spin ride. Its software is constantly bench-pressing health and wellness data on 35M athleisure-coated customers -- It knows when, where, and how you prefer sweating. That's valuable stuff.

The Takeaway: Mindbody needs a spotter... Founded in '01, Mindbody hasn't been profitable and shares are down 25% this year (before the generous acquisition offer). It recently splurged $200M to buy other scheduling apps, but Mindbody needs a hands-on adjustment from its new instructor.

Fun Fact: Mindbody has a "before/after" pic -- it used to be known as "Hardbody" before it dropped the weights to become "Mindbody."

2. "The Mnuchin Call" was this year's awkward coal

It's like the babysitter calling... just to tell the parents "Everything is great! No issue with the kids eating lead paint here! Have a fun date night." While vacaying hard in Cabo, Mexico, Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin issued a press release telling us he talked to CEOs of the 6 biggest banks. And everything is fiiiine.

Shows his boss he was working... And he claims banks have plenty of money to handle a market downturn and not ask for government bailouts. Nobody thought that was an issue (it was back in '08, but we've come a long way since the financial crisis). Now people think it's an issue. So they tanked markets.

The Takeaway: Investors believe in valuations and growth... (Steve didn't mention those). Stock prices today are 20% less on average than they were 84 days ago at their highs. That's because investors have re-calculated what stocks are worth based on econ valuations and profit growth. Government PR fluff can't do that.

What else we're 'Snacking

  • Venture: A Danish startup makes underwear you can healthfully wear for weeks
  • Green Rush: Cannabis investments have now almost quadrupled this year
  • China: Ofo, the Chinese bike-share worth billions, may now be bankrupt
  • New Year: Buffalo Wild Wings gets a nationwide makeover
  • eDrive: Tesla dropped after Elon said he'd reimburse your tax credit if your car arrives late

Today's MarketSnacks Yearly Podcast

  • Our 3 Takeaways from 2018: The big things you need to remember before 2019's resolutions 
Just Push Play:

'SnackFact of the Day
Cash is the most wanted Christmas gift by Americans. Cold. Hard. Cash.

Submitted by Shawn P. (New York, NY)
Send Us One


  • The Partial US government shutdown continues (400K federal workers are sans pay...) 
  • Consumer Sentiment Poll
  • Boxing Day in Britain and Canada (the name awkwardly comes from servants going home to box presents)

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