Doing Life Together

Some of my greatest blessings are my friends. I am so grateful for the influence they've had on my life. I have an incredibly diverse group of friends. In fact, if I got them all together in one place I am certain they would never get along. They come from different backgrounds, think differently, and have some very different perspectives on life. Some are very conservative and others are anything but conservative. Some are followers of Jesus, while others haven't made that decision and maybe never will. 
Regardless, they are still great friends of mine. Friends add value, insight, wisdom, and fulfillment to our lives.
 
Over the years, I have discovered the value of diversity in friendships; how to accept it, gain from it, and celebrate it. I was asked if I consider myself color blind when it comes to racial and ethnic differences. I answered no, absolutely not. I see the color, I am aware of the cultural and ethnic differences, but that's exactly what I love the most. Celebrating diversity as equals, and growing together because of it. Together we are more than we could ever be individually.

The Old Testament Prophet Amos challenged his generation with the importance of laying aside our differences and agreeing to walk together. "Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?"(Amos 3:3 NIV) We will never get along until we agree to get along! I've heard that statement used to insist on uniformity. “If we don't completely agree on everything we can't walk together.” Walking together must become our priority or we will always find a reason not to. Walking together requires the agreement and willingness to do so. Commitment, respect, listening, humility and communication are all major factors. We are in this together and can walk together regardless of our differences. According to "Christianity Today", there are over 38,000 Christian denominations worldwide. Most were birthed out of disagreement. People couldn't agree to disagree and continue to love and honor so they divided. You would be amazed by how insignificant many of the issues actually were. Amos is actually saying there is no way we will tolerate differences of opinion and do life together unless we make a commitment to do so. History has proved him right! 

IMPORTANT STEPS MOVING FORWARD:
 

MAKE RELATIONSHIPS PRIORITY.
"Let me give you a new command: Love one another...this is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples - when they see the love you have for each other". John 13:35  (MSG) 
Friendship must be developed and nourished. That takes time, commitment, vulnerability and communication. Several years ago, friends of mine Don and Heather Double wrote a book titled, LOVE IS SPELLED T-I-M-E! Most of us live pretty busy lives. If relationships are not priority, we will always default to our busy schedules rather than maintaining healthy relationships.
 
ALLOW DIFFERENCES TO CHALLENGE US NOT DIVIDE US.
Historically, the church has divided over denominational preference and doctrine. While that still happens, today it is more about issues that can be even more divisive. If we don't agree, we become enemies. Instead of seeking common ground, we attack, marginalize and discredit. Social media has become a perfect way to blast people and interject our opinions without much thought or consideration. I've learned a huge amount from friends that think differently than I do. When I take the time to listen and hear their perspective, it broadens my understanding. Sometimes it actually changes how I think. Other times it reinforces what I already believe to be true. If I only interact with people that think just like I do and surround myself with "like minded" people, I am never challenged to grow and can easily become isolated in my thinking and perspectives. When we listen and really try to understand what someone is saying, we demonstrate how we value them.
 
BUILD FRIENDSHIPS WITH PEOPLE DIFFERENT THAN YOU.
Building friendships with people that come from a different ethnic group, church, social or economic background as well as people who think differently than you most often requires deliberateness on our part. It takes time, patience, courage, risk and a willingness to listen. My experience is that it is more than worth it. The rewards are huge! "Become friends with people who aren't your age. Hang out with people whose first language isn't the same as yours. Get to know someone who doesn't come from your social class. This is how you see the world. This is how you grow."

FIND COMMON GROUND AND BUILD ON IT.
Sir Isaac Newton wrote, "We build far to many walls, and far to few bridges." Walls are built out of fear and designed to keep people out. Bridges are inviting. They open a way to cross a barrier that would otherwise not be crossable.
What do we have in common? The details may be different, the stories may vary but our basic life necessities are much the same.