Can I be your Valentine?
Let me read you a Bedtime Story!

I haven't been the best Valentine lately. 

I promised you contests and I promised you free stuff. I said you'd be special. But what have I done for you lately?

Well, you are special. You're my e-newsletter readers, and this month, I have something JUST for you. It will be our little secret, OK?

Normally, I encourage you to share information about my books, stories, etc., but this month, I'm releasing the links to follow just for you. Please don't share them. I don't want them to become public because, well, they're a little racy. And I thought - what better Valentine's Day gift to give you, my friends, fans and mailing list members?

OK, get on with it already, right? 

Here's the deal. Last week, I did a special "Not Your Parent's Valentine's Day" edition reading at Chicago's Tuesday Funk show. I read an unpublished erotic-humor story called "Cheerleader for the Labia." (Don't look for any horror in this one!)  It's a er, stirring love story about a geek voyeur and a kinky exhibitionist. A match made in heaven. Or cheerleading hell. The reading went over great -- with lots of audience participation (I never thought in my life that I would have a room of 50 people shouting out the word "Labia" at the top of their lungs. Life throws some funny curves that way.)

I'm not releasing this video publicly, for, I think, obvious reasons. Nor will I likely ever publish the story. So this link is between you and me. I hope you'll click the image below and listen, smile and enjoy. Oh and... I wouldn't advise playing this at work.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKDevPFMgso

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Still Awake?
Let me read to you some more...

If the "Cheerleader" isn't enough for you, I also did a special recording a couple months ago for the BDSM Reading Group on Goodreads.com. I recorded an audio reading (with occasional sound effects)  of two chapters from NightWhere, which are also posted on YouTube -- also on a private link. So don't spread this one around either.

This is for you.

Listen to me read an excerpt from NightWhere here, if you'd like another "Bedtime Story."

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Amazon puts Siren on their 100 List for Valentine's Month!

This month, Amazon.com decided that my Siren was sexy enough to feature on their Valentine's 100 Kindle Books for $3.99 or Less list! They've put the novel in the top slot in their SF/F section and are promoting it at only $0.99! I'm pretty excited about this, because with that kind of exposure, it should get onto the Kindles of hundreds of readers who have never been exposed to my work before. I'm crossing my fingers and hoping they'll enjoy the read!

If you haven't ever had a chance to read Siren, I hope you'll take advantage of the opportunity to download this for your Kindle, iPad, computer, whatever. And I hope you'll spread the word to any of your friends who might enjoy a little taste of what I've sometimes called, "Fatal Attraction with a mermaid!":

Siren: http://www.amazon.com/Siren-ebook/dp/B003YUCGAA

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Emilie Simon Week on my Facebook

On my Facebook page this week, I've been posting an Emilie Simon song every day as my Valentine's Day tribute. Emilie is a French singer-songwriter who has a unique voice and sound, and her songs run the gamut from icy anti-Valentines to lush odes to lust and love.

Fans of Kate Bush should really enjoy her work. I know I do. In case you missed those posts, here's one of my favorite tracks of hers that I posted on Tuesday. It's a song called "(Roses Never) Never Fall In Love."

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A free read for you... from the 10th Anniversary Edition of Vigilantes of Love

By now you're probably tired of hearing me read things and perhaps, you'd prefer to just read to yourself.

I understand.

Well, last month, I launched the 10th Anniversary Edition of my 2nd short fiction collection Vigilantes of Love. The book includes a handful of never-before-reprinted stories, as well as the original contents of the book, and is available from all the usual ebook platforms for just 99 cents for a limited time. But for Valentine's Day, I thought you might want a free read from that collection that is appropriate for the holiday. So...

Take a peek at "Hard Heart," which is freely available to read  in the fiction section of my website. It's a light fantasy piece which I hope will warm the heart.

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Enjoy the one you love, love the one you're with...

Life's short and then you die. Sometimes in ridiculously horrible ways.

I hope you'll take some time out this week and revel in the pleasures of seedy congress with another human animal. It's good for the soul. And they say, if you do it right, for the complexion.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Yours in Dark (Lustful) Arts,
John